,by Christina Carney
I’d like to be honest here and tell you that I didn’t learn much about how to take care of myself from our conventional mental health system. It seemed more focused on illness than wellness and the tools they offered up seemed to have limited usefulness. At best, they taught me how to cope, but I knew I wanted more than just to cope. I wanted to know what it would be like to transform, to heal and to thrive. Therapy was useful to a certain extent but that 50 minutes a week, or every other week wasn’t enough. I needed something that I could integrate into my life, something that would support me through all of life’s ups and downs. Not a tool, but a foundation: something to build on.
I found it in the form of Practice. I had some experience with Practice with piano and theatre but what I hadn’t understood was how intention and mindfulness turned it into something more meaningful and supportive. In 2005, I came across an idea that would change that for me: I started an image-making Practice. It was my place to play, explore and be free. It could take any form – drawing, painting, pastels, clay – but my aim was to let go of having an outcome. Harder said than done. One of the things I had to do was make an agreement with myself that I wouldn’t show anyone my work. This allowed me to shift away from others expectations and any preconceived ideas I had about what art was supposed to be. And it worked. I learned so much from that initial Practice and what I learned wasn’t just about art – I was learning about how I wanted to live my life. It was teaching me how to be more present in myself, to sit with whatever feelings came up and to notice the wonder in the world around me.
What really makes Practice special is that I get to practice things within it. An example: painting allows me to practice being patient. I sometimes get frustrated with a piece and just want it to be finished. Art teaches me to step away, to give it space and time. To keep going even when I want it to be done. I never got that from a coping technique.
My Practice has expanded over the years to include writing and yoga. Each different form has different teachings for me. After 15 years, I can really appreciate what having these Practices has done for me. They provided me with what I was looking for all those years ago: a container for transforming, healing and cultivating wellness. My Practices have my back, giving me the support I need. They have become the foundation I was seeking.
Here is the best news: Anything can be a Practice. Find something you’re already doing, or interested in, do it consistently, and bring intention to it. Do it like you mean it and then absorb the teachings it has to offer you. Find a means of reflection so you can really take them in. Maybe a friend, journaling, or meditation. And if you’re thinking that you don’t have time, I have more good news for you: Even 10 minutes of being in Practice can be helpful. Your wellness is worth it. You are worth it.
*The above image is from my Visual Journal, which has also been a part of my Practice over the years.
Christina Carney is the Coordinator of the Peer Voice Project at Via Hope, a leadership program for people with lived experiences around trauma, mental health and substance use. You can read her blog on leadership here.
